Spoiler alert! This story discusses parts of the October 12 episode of The Golden Bachelor.
The formats of The Golden Bachelor and the flagship Bachelor Nation dating shows may be similar, but just three weeks into the first season of the franchise’s newest spinoff, it’s pretty obvious that they couldn’t be more different. Gerry Turner’s journey so far has been uplifting and pure, if not a little tragic, with the cast members searching for someone to spend the final years of their lives with, after many have already dealt with the loss of a spouse. There’s another issue, too, that The Golden Bachelor faced again on Thursday’s episode that hasn’t really plagued The Bachelor/Bachelorette.
Joan Vassos became the second woman in two weeks to have to self-eliminate because she was needed at home by her family. After breaking out of her comfort zone with a hilarious and genuine poem on their group date talent show, Joan was treated to a romantic dinner with Gerry Turner, and sparks were flying as the 72-year-old widower gave her the first rose of the week. The celebration was short-lived, however, as the next morning she got a message from her daughter that she was needed back home.
Her daughter had just experienced a tough child birth, and Joan Vassos tearfully explained to the other women and to Gerry Turner why she had to leave. The senior Bachelor was the very definition of crestfallen — saying he’d gotten “out of bed dancing” that morning following their date — and so was the rest of the cast, as Kathy Swarts sobbed at how unfair it was, saying:
My heart’s breaking. I know how bad she wanted to be here. I can’t imagine, especially after having the date and got the rose. It makes it even harder for her.
The saddest part of it all — and the reason Kathy Swarts and the others likely empathized so much with Joan Vassos’ situation — is that this is a group of women who have likely been prioritizing their children and other family members ahead of themselves for decades. Joan even called her decision to be on The Golden Bachelor “selfish,” and to see this opportunity seized from her when she’d finally decided to do something for herself is simply heartbreaking.
The same thing happened to Marina Perera a week earlier. After receiving a rose on Night 1, Marina was forced to bow out, explaining to Gerry Turner in an unaired scene posted to The Golden Bachelor’s Instagram account that she had to put her family’s needs first:
This was a likely unintended issue for The Golden Bachelor, but it’s probably one that’s not going away. We’ve seen contestants have to leave The Bachelor/Bachelorette every once in a while for family emergencies or to get back to a young child, but even in those situations, there’s often another parent or at least grandparents involved to help out. That’s not how it is with these women, and it’s unprecedented to see this type of self-elimination twice in three episodes. But, as Joan Vassos put it, you don’t stop being a mom just because your kids grow up.
Par for the course, Gerry Turner has remained supportive of the women’s decisions, and even as disappointed as he was to lose Joan Vassos, he agreed that commitment to family comes first. It’ll be interesting to see if this becomes a trend that continues throughout The Golden Bachelor’s premiere season. Tune in at 8 p.m. ET Thursdays on ABC, with episodes also available to stream the next day with a Hulu subscription.